Archive
Drunk and in Love with Grammar (Lonely Island – Semicolon Song)
A COMMA AND A FUCKING DOT. SEMICOLON.
The Lonely Island – “Semicolon (feat. Solange)”
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Hendricks is my new favorite gin!
I think this doesn’t even count as grammar. Punctuation is under syntax? I dunno. Fuck. I wasn’t an English major.
Fuck you, English majors. JK. I think I might major in English because it’d be the easiest degree for me to complete and majors don’t matter much anymore if you want to go to grad school.
I’m going to create a category for “Drunk Blogging.”
SEMICOLONS
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Oh wait, shit.
Cross-applying Poetry Fundamentals to Prose
I’ve been super busy this week with socializing and job searching, but I have been trying to maintain this blog on a semi-regular basis. When I’m lazy or there’s no interesting news about to comment on, I’ve decided to default to a good autobiographical life advice post.
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For those of you that don’t know, I used to write poetry. I never thought it was that good–more like broken prose with clever enjambment. (I never did write a sonnet that I was fully happy with.) There were some cheap PoMo tricks, like line breaking on a word with multiple meanings, that I used very often back then and still do, to some extent, in my prose. But I haven’t written anything that was more poetry than than prose in recent years since non-fiction has consumed my soul.
I will testify that studying classic and modern poetry when I was a teenager has greatly improved my general writing skills as an adult. English profs know it well: When you start analyzing poetry on a functional level below interpretation and meaning, you start paying attention to literary elements like syntax, punctuation, and rhythm. And all writing starts to “flow” better.
Alliteration and assonance all over everything. < See what I did there with “alliteration” and “all?” There are also “v” sounds in “over” and “everything” that create a cohesive sound pattern. (Repetition of consonant sounds is called “consonance.”) These techniques and literary devices work, whether you’re consciously aware of them or not, and this is generally how people judge a work as “good”–based on these literary devices embedded in historical standards.
If you’re a writer, it’s good to be consciously aware of these literary devices (not to be confused with the larger concept of literary techniques), so you can use them to your advantage.
Check out those links that I hyperlinked above if you don’t know anything about poetic devices. If you’re a writer that wants to get better, and you haven’t already, start paying attention to the poetic devices that you already use.
Feel free to ask questions in the comments.
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[Edit: Sorry, I had to manually fix the HTML since it formatted weird after I prematurely submitted.]
Riddle Me Pinks…
- by ~FireSoulPhoenix, Mar 5, 2007, 7:14:58 PM
- Candice Hall
she’s passed
the point where peripheral vision
blurs into her inverted gut
and she cries about the virus of society
she’s afraid
she’s catching tonight
the way she’ll waste
bootlaces in urinals
to see what shape they make
when they float
leave
bumblebee pinstripes
and chalk scrawled
half past noon,
on the changing station
a graffiti-fied gaffe)
“this is the art
of perfecting denial,”
she’ll exhale
before passing to the right
because she’s just that much
of an insidious
fuck
like the festering manifestoes
of bad hair dye jobs
and thrift store sweaters)
it’s Sunday now; she’s alone in a crowd.
the children will be coming home
for Christmas and she’s
let the cat out again.


On “epic” and “fail” and the English language.
via The Best Page in the Universe
Oh no! 4chan slang has permeated the zeitgeist. Whatever shall we do?
Despite what you may have thought from this post’s title and my utterly sexy command of the syntax and mechanics of the English language, I am writing today to defend the use of these fail-chan spawned, meme-generating words.
Indeed, I am guilty of slipping out an “epic” or a “fail” in my real life speech–evidence that the semantics of these units of language have transgressed their e-print abode, and 4chan deserves a note in the OED.
What makes me not an asshole is that I don’t deign to believe that my usage of these words is witty or original. It’s when you start posting terrible one-liners on forums using these bastardizations of the English language like you’re the funniest person in the world that you become that person no one likes.
People also don’t like anal-retentive nitpickers. Fail Blog is popular for a reason. Get over it, you English elitists.