Archive
Laughing at the terms and conditions of pop-up ads
http://customersurveypanels.com/offer/vc/terms.html
Their ads are everywhere and somehow elude chrome and firefox’s otherwise decent pop-up blockers.
Money quote: “To the fullest extent permissible pursuant to applicable law, customersurveypanels.com disclaims all warranties, express or implied, including, but not limited to, implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose and non-infringement.”
I don’t want to quote any more for fear of violating “fair use” in case they are litigious motherfuckers. But it’s hilarious.
Basically it says:
Please give away your personal data and waste your time on surveys. We have no legal obligation to uphold anything on our site. You’ll never get your free ipod. Go fuck yourself.
Since we’re on the gay post theme.
The NYtimes does a great interview with long-time gay rights activist Dan Savage about his It Gets Better project.
One of the criticisms of the project is that it’s too celebrity- and politician-driven. That’s true if you’re paying attention only to the celeb and politician videos, which are a tiny portion of the total. The first videos that poured in were average ordinary people who watched our video. … It can be tremendously powerful for the queer kids in school to know artists like Gaga are on their side. They also need to know you don’t have to be Gaga or one of her dancers to be happy.
Exactly. I think Lady Gaga is excellent at rallying for LGBT rights in the media and at parade parties. But in terms of leveling with politicians on civil rights terms and relating to average people, Dan Savage is a better spokesperson.
Why Eminem and Rihanna’s Love the Way You Lie vid is so popular
1. Megan Fox. I mean, come on! Megan Fox! If there’s a reason anyone paid money to see Transformers 2 it was Megan Fox. Pouty lips, tattoos, and talks about sex all the time. She’s mini-Angelina. Next thing you know, she’ll be adopting babies from Africa and parading them around in awful outfits.
2. Charlie from Lost. Do you know his real name? I don’t. He’s just “that rock star from Lost” who got to make out with a hot chick in that show too. What a pimp, although now he’ll be typecast forever as a heroin addict. I looked it up; his name is Dominic Bernard Patrick Luke Monaghan, because he’s so hardcore he needs 3 middle names. You might also recognize him as one of those nasty hobbitses from LOTR:
3. Fire. Self-sustaining exothermic oxidation reactions. Let’s burn a house down and then sing about it in front of it. And put in some cool CGI effects of self-immolation. Because fire. Fire!
4. Domestic abuse. Appeal to the trailer park redneck in us all.
5. Joseph Kahn. NYU drop-out prodigy, he was director of… like every cool music video with tight editing in the last 10 years.
6. Rihanna and Eminem. Rihanna who is cashing in as much as possible on getting beat by Chris Brown. And Emimen who is cashing in as much as possible about supposedly being clean.
Lady Gaga, the iPhone, Facebook, and BP oil can all SUCK MY DICK
That’s a lie. I don’t have a dick upon which to suck. And I actually like all of those except for BP and that time Facebook violated privacy and intellectual property rights (they’re better now).
What I’ve learned from blogging and looking at my handy Blog Stats provided by WordPress is that my most popular posts are the ones where I bash popular things. Makes sense.
Although I am losing faith in the human race when I find I get hits from searches like “tazered twat.” Really, why would you look on wordpress for pics and vids of tazered twat? Freaks.
Here’s a video of my favorite stand-up comedian, Louis CK, talking about sucking dick.
Oh, and Lady Gaga.
(Just for fun, I’ll throw the word “boobs” in here too.)
The Economics of Being Female
I wikipedia'd "feminist." I got this chick. *shrug*
I’m a feminist. Now, we can dabble semantics about what that word means and complicate it with adding modifiers like “first wave” and “third wave,” but the end of the day, it’s all about equality with men. (Another debatable phrase. I know.)
I’m not going to spend this post arguing about how the word “feminism” has come to have an unfortunate, pejorative rep. (Thanks in part to Rush Limbaugh somehow associating it with Nazism.)
I want to talk about something else. A topic that’s less touched upon in my experience: The financial consequences in American society of having a XX chromosome and a subsequent vagina and tits.
I’m going to use myself as a reference because I think I have some credentials as being a woman. Let’s take a look at some of the prices of clothing I have in my closet:
Pair of Skinny Jeans from Macy’s— $29.99
Blouse from Kohl’s— $14.99
Pair of Panties from Victoria’s Secret— $4.99
Full-coverage Bra From Aerie— $29.99
That’s $80 just to get dressed in the morning with standard, non-sale clothing from popular middle-class stores. Not including shoes. Matching shoes. Women are notorious for having to have the matching shoes for the outfit.
I might be able to skim $30 of that total if I happen to be in the mall on sale days and snag the bra and jeans for half price.
My daily make-up:
A 2 oz bottle of Almay Cover-up/Foundation— $9.99 (It does last a few months, though.)
Peppermint lip gloss from Bath and Body works—$5.00
Prestige brand Liquid eyeliner— $5.99
I consider myself relatively low maintenance for a girl in terms of the amount of make-up I own. I’m not including in there the price of make up brushes and utensils.
I could go into great detail about the cost of tampons, handbags, haircuts, hair styling products, perfume, lotion, and all the other miscellaneous girly implements and services, but I’m going to cut to the moral of the story:
If men ask me out on a date, I let them pay for it. Because if I’m dishing out the equivalent or more just to make myself look presentable according to societal standards, then I believe I’m worth it.
Seasonal Affective Disorder
The idea of “I get depressed and like to sit around on the couch and eat, so I have this thing called seasonal affective disorder.” No, it’s called winter, okay asshole? And we all get it, and that’s why we invented hockey and football. Okay? So you could sit on the couch and eat Cheetos for four months, or you can go outside.
-Denis Leary
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Satire, Gay Barbarians, and Banana Man
This heatwave is making me loopy. I need to stick my sheets in the freezer and then wrap myself in them while sitting on a block of ice. I can’t tell the difference between satire and reality–Congress Continues Debate Over Whether Or Not Nation Should Be Economically Ruined
Oh, The Onion, your sanity makes me want to cry sweet tears of confusion.
Mark Morford of SFChronicle has some questions about these so very confusing times in our political climate:
In other news, here are Gay Barbarians protesting Dr. Marcus Bachmann:
Here’s a cool island song about Banana Man: