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May 2008

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Archive for May, 2008

Ouch.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24797758

“You actually used the word ‘assassination’ in a time when there is a fear unspoken, but vivid and terrible, that our again troubled land and fractured political landscape might target a black man running for president or a white man or a white woman…. In retrospect we failed her when we did not call her out [for her Time’s March sixth article reference to RFK’s assassination]”

Categories: Politics or: the art of looking for trouble Tags: assassination, comment, countdown, hillary clinton, keith olbermann, Kennedy

I despise clothes shopping. It is my least favorite kind of shopping because you can’t reliably do it all online. I hate the way the sales associates say “how are you?” as if they really care. I hate the cold blank stares from the food-disorder-inducing mannequins with ivory hipbones that could pierce your soul. I hate the way fluorescent lighting in dressing rooms makes everyone look sickly and imperfect and SELF ESTEEM KICK IN THE NUTS.

But most of all I hate the lack of clothing that is both practical and cute. Yes, I am a girl and want to look good. But goddamit, they’re making it so hard.

Just look at this banner from mandee.com

When did clashing become the cool thing to do? “Hello, I am a hippie bimbo-trucker-future teen pregnancy victim! Let my chest mesmerize you with its Mayan intricacy.” Sorry, model, but I’d prefer not to buy sandals that look like what Jesus would have worn. Maybe that outfits works for you, but the average person isn’t followed around by a color-coordinated graphic background.

Read more…

Categories: Social commentary Tags: clothes, criticism, crocs, fail, fashion, hate, mandees, shopping, spring summer, sucks, women

Our second amendment quite pithily reads:

“A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.”

Yay for awkward and archaic grammatical structuring! But even when looked at the context of the language of the time period, many constitutional law questions can occur:

Who is covered under “the People” and who are they in relative to the “militia”?

What exactly does “keep and bear arms” mean and at what point is “infringing”?

I say we avoid these “let’s guess what our forefathers meant” questions altogether and allow unrestricted gun purchasing ability to any adult citizen who isn’t a criminal. Assault weapons too.

Then we completely outlaw ammunition.

Everyone now has the right to bear arms, a vast array of tools with which to bludgeon your enemies. Free bear arms with every purchase.

Categories: dictionary.reference.com/search?q=satire Tags: consitutional law, right to bear arms, second amendment

In lieu of recent civil rights break through in California, I decided I would reiterate some of the main points from my same-sex essay. The essay is about 2000 words, so I can understand why it’s not getting many fullviews. I too have a short attention span, and mostly read tumblelogs.

Quoteth the AP article “California’s top court legalizes gay marriage”:

“Essentially, this boils down to love. We love each other. We now have equal rights under the law,” declared a jubilant Robin Tyler, a plaintiff in the case along with her partner. She added: “We’re going to get married. No Tupperware, please.”

*headdesk*

1. Marriage is not about love, not in the government ratified sense. No ones preventing gays from loving, living together, or even having a ceremony. Plenty of people who aren’t in love get married.

2. Marriage is not “sacred”, unless you’re talking about in the spiritual or religious sense. Somebody please tell Bush there’s a separation of church and state.

2. Legal marriage is about the 1049 rights, benefits, and privileges are granted by the federal government and the hundreds more granted by the state. Marriage is also about having the title “marriage” so that “equivalent” civil unions don’t echo the failed separate but equal concept.

3. Stop calling it “gay marriage.” Same-sex marriage allows people of the gender to marry regardless of sexual orientation. I’m straight and I want the option to marry a woman if I want to. I want to be able to say, “This is my heterosexual life partner. She is the Jay to my Silent Bob. I want her to be the one that takes custody of me if I’m in a coma and receive my social security when I die.” I’m probably not going to, but goddammit I want that right.

Categories: Politics or: the art of looking for trouble Tags: california, civil rights, gay marriage, heterosexual life partner, same-sex marriage

In the opening scene of Iron Man, an obnoxious black guy sitting behind me in the AMC commented, “Sheeiit, it always starts in a desert.”

Indeed, plenty of bad action flicks start out in the desert, US military officers in humvees and all. But with an excellent cast and tactful direction, Iron Man would prove to set a high bar for the comic movies of summer 2008 to come. Read more…

Categories: Reviews Tags: comic movie, Iron Man, marvel, movie review, robert downey jr.

So apparently I missed the memo that you’re supposed to name your domain after your blog name. Like the rebel I am, I made my domain my username instead. Quite frankly, I’m indecisive as an ADD kid who forgot his “special bandaid,” and I’m going to change my blog name several times in the future. An inconsistent url would bother me.

So I hope you readers, whoever you are, don’t get too attached to Clantily Scad. That title was a suggestion from a very special asian girl who owes her life to sparkling cider and mansex.

And I’m going to work on trying to post without any sexual references. I promise. Unless that’s what you want. Or do I just need to even out the sex with violence? Violence, you say?

*google image searches “violence”*

Apparently this:

is a logo “against family violence” even though it looks like the kid is punching his conjoined asexual parents.

Categories: Uncategorized Tags: add, oh my, sex, social awkwardness, violence, wordpress