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Liveblogging the CNN Tea Party Republican Primary Debate

This is a spontaneous endeavor, so bear with me.  Popping my liveblogging cherry!

8:03  I haven’t watched many debate openings, but is that how networks normally present them?  “Rick Santorum – The Fighter?”  Isn’t “the guy who needs to quit now or will go broke” a more appropriate epithet?  I love how they later referred to Herman Cain as the “pizza guy.”  Is this a debate or a reality TV Show?  I guess both.

8:10  Wolf Blitzer indeed has a glorious beard.

8:13 Nice of you to talk to Michelle Bachmann first, unlike MSNBC’s snubbing of her last time.  Her answer was still terrible though.

8:18  “We’re having a conversation, right now.”  Mitt Romney to Rick Perry.  The moderators are letting some bickering go on.  The crowd loves it.  The “ooh ooh ooh ohh!” coming from the crowd is deserving of some fist-pumping.

8:30 I wasn’t really paying attention to Mitt Romney’s talk about growing the private sector, because I was busy admiring at his gorgeous salt and peppered coiffure.

8:39 “[The stimulus] created zero jobs.”  Rick Perry blatantly lies.

[The Indecision Live-blog  says, “Does Ron Paul for serious think that we’d ever elect a person who wears a plaid tie?”]

[Andrew Sullivan says Rick Perry has a “smug teflon smirk that this crowd is lapping up… As he strutted onto the stage he looked like a rooster in an Italian suit.”  Accurate analysis.]

8:49  Finally a Ronald Reagan reference. Thanks Newt!

8:58 Michelle Bachman talking about leashes.  Fiscal… Discipline!

9:07 If this was a slow talking contest, Rick Perry would win.  He’s so ashamed of his Gardasil stint.

9:09  Still, I get the impression Rick Perry is really afraid of dying of cervical cancer.

9:20 Ron Paul wants to legalize “alternative” medicine.  That’s the cure for rising health care costs. Leeches for everyone!

9:25 “I’m Wolf Blitzer, now back to the… psych! Back to commercials.”  What was the point of that?  Thanks for letting me know your name, Wolf Blitzer.

9:31 Ooh, Rick Perry got his first boos.  I’m glad the mods and other candidates are calling out RP on his hypocrisy.

9:38  My immigration attorney boyfriend got Jon Huntsman’s H1-B reference. He’s the only one.

9:46 What would you bring the White House if you moved in?  A Bible.  A Bible.  Another Bible.  An army of unvaccinated foster children.  And not Mexicans.

9:50 There’s nothing I want more than a creepy bust of Winston Church in my house.

That’s a wrap!  All that happened tonight is that we’re reminded that Michelle Bachmann is against the violation of little girls, Rick Perry regrets violating little girls, and Tea Partiers will boo at anything that doesn’t involve wrapping themselves in the copies of the Constitution to ward off the terrorists (and the Mexicans).

Click here to read to my annotated transcript of the Sept. 7 Politico-sponsored bitch-fest.