Why is everything on the news depressing?

It’s either depressing news or amusing non-news.  Nothing good ever happens in the real world.

Speaking of The Real World, The Village Voice analyzes the casting contract people who are on the show have to sign and interprets thusly:

You may die, lose limbs, and suffer nervous breakdowns… You may be humiliated and explicitly portrayed “in a false light…”  Interacting with other cast members carries the risk of “non-consensual physical contact” and should you contract AIDS, etc. during such an interaction, MTV is not responsible… If you get kicked off the show, it will be filmed.

Who wants to help me make my casting video?

In the news, Fareed Zakaria tells everyone what they already know, except Joe Lieberman, about defense spending.  The stocks and GDP take a dump, but they’re just correcting themselves in the foreground of the shitty economy.  And a Swedish man is arrested for trying to go CERN in his kitchen and split some atoms.  Darwin award nominee?

I need something happy. Here is Planet of the Apes getting loose with some Benny Benassi. With glowsticks!




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